Key events
73 min De Bruyne rams a curler well wide from the edge of the D.
71 min Cucurellaâs deep cross is spilled by Ederson, who is relieved to see the ball drop to Doku rather than a Chelsea player. The move was started by Neto, who has been bright since coming on as substitute.
69 min City are passing the clock down at every opportunity. Truly, nobody does it better.
67 min: Double substitution for Chelsea Here come some of the new boys: Kiernan Dewsbury-Hall and Marc Guiu replace Romeo Lavia, who had a really good game, and Nicolas Jackson.
65 min: Lewis has a goal disallowed! Haaland pulls away from Colwill to chest down De Bruyneâs flipped pass into the box. Colwill gets back to make a crucial interception and is then fouled by Haaland. The ball runs loose to Lewis, who rattles it past Ederson â but then Anthony Taylor blows for the foul.
Haaland scraped his studs down Colwillâs leg and is booked. It wasnât deliberate, but it looked painful.
63 min âI realise that the absurdities of football finances in general, and the current Chelsea regime in particular, have rendered transfer fees nearly meaningless, but has Enzo Fernández ever looked like a hundred million pound player?â asks Kári Tulinius. âHeâs a very useful part of the Argentine national team, but he always seems a bit lost when playing for Chelsea. Though heâs not alone in that.â
Not even close, although heâs only 23 and thatâs pretty young for a player in his position. Itâd be fascinating to know what data made Chelsea so desperate to pay that much money for him.
Mind you, youâd probably the same about Caicedo on his Chelsea form and he was marvellous at Brighton.
61 min: Fine save by Ederson! After a bit of Chelsea pressure, Lavia heads the ball towards Jackson in the six-yard box. He twists to hit a volley that is kept out dramatically by Ederson. Either side of the keeper and it would probably have gone in.
60 min City break very dangerously from the corner, only for Doku to play a loose pass across to Haaland. Doku hasnât had his finest game.
59 min Caicedoâs long-range shot is blocked and rebounds back to him. He plays an excellent pass to Fernandez on the right side of the area, and he slides a teasing low ball across goal. Lewis does brilliantly to get in front of the forward, not sure who it was, and put the ball behind for a corner. Without that touch Chelsea would have scored.
58 min: Chelsea substitution Pedro Neto replaces Christopher Nkunku, who had a quiet game on the left. City have controlled this second half so itâs a good time to bring on Neto.
57 min It took 57 minutes.
âCan I be the first to congratulate Manchester City on their unprecedented fifth title in a row,â writes Matt Dony. âBest league in the world(!).â
56 min âSpeaking of twin peaks, have a look at the finely groomed bald heads of Pep Guardiola and Enzo Maresca!â chirps Peter Oh. âAre they the best in the league though? Iâm not sure. Arne Slotâs smooth and shapely pate and Erik ten Hagâs slick noggin will surely have something to say about that. Iâve got a hunch that this season will baldly go where no previous one has gone.â
What do they know of baldness who only baldness know?
55 min Cucurella exchanges unpleasantries with Bernardo Silva, probably in an attempt to get himself going more than anything.
54 min Fofana flattens Haaland and is a bit lucky not to receive a yellow card.
53 min âAgree with your correspondent that this season has started with a bit of low-key shrug,â writes Ben Kybett. âI think this often seems the case in an Olympic summer, when the efforts of that spirit of plucky amateurism (however illusory in many cases) in underwatched-sports contrasts with the ubiquity of Premier League plutocrat-ball. Weâll be hooked again by the time the clocks go back.â
Sil. Cheer me up babe.
(NB: Clip contains adult language)
52 min: Good save by Sanchez! De Bruyneâs pass deflects to Bernardo Silva, who squares it to Haaland just inside the area. He sweeps a first-time shot that is pushed away to his right by the diving Sanchez. Haaland might have done better there, simply because heâs him.
50 min: âWith all those beastliness flying about,â begins Steve Bradfield, âhave Chelsea experienced a bit of EBH – egregious bodily harm?â
For the unfamiliar, EBH are his initials: Erling Bloody* Haaland.
* Braut
49 min Almost a chance for Chelsea, but Jackson and Fernandez get in each otherâs way. Chelsea have been really heavy-footed in the City penalty area.
47 min Loud groans from the home fans as Sanchez passes the ball straight to De Bruyne on the left edge of the area. He got away with it because De Bruyne overhit his cross.
46 min Peep peep! Chelsea begin the second half.
Update: Savinho is not okay. Some chancer called Phil Foden has come on to replace him.
Half-time reading
Half time: Chelsea 0-1 Man City
Cityâs B-game is still enough for them to dominate most Premier League teams and that was the case in the first half at Stamford Bridge. Erling Haaland finished expertly in the 18th minute and, though Chelsea improved as the half progressed, their attacking play had a kind of virginal enthusiasm. They need to calm down in the second half.
I think Savinho is okay to continue by the way.
45+6 min Another unsuccessful appeal for a penalty, this time when Nkunku goes down. My first impression is that he was trying it on.
45+3 min Chelsea again enquire about a penalty when Fernandez goes over in the area after a challenge from Dias, who kind of fell into him. VAR wonât overturn the decision but thatâs the kind of penalty that would have been given in 2020-21 when they were penalising all contact.
45+1 min Five minutes of added time.
44 min: Jackson has a goal disallowed! Palmerâs shot from the edge of the area was spilled by Ederson, an unusual mistake that was punished by Jackson â or at least it would have been had Jackson not gone too early.
42 min âLoved Twin Peaks but utterly failed to understand what was going on towards the end,â says Richard Hirst. âYour reference to Killer BOB made me Google him, only to find that I utterly fail to understand what it says there about him. Still, it was fun being reminded of THE great watercooler TV show. Though if I was Haaland I might sue you for the comparison.â
Come on now. Itâs like I compared him to Windom Earle.
41 min In fact it was Caicedo who clobbered De Bruyne, though Doku was in the vicinity.
Savinho is also down and that looks more serious. Itâll be such a shame if he has to go off; heâs been really impressive.
40 min Bernardo Silvaâs low shot from a tight angle is kicked away by Sanchez after a fast City break. He was set up by De Bruyne, who was then flattened â possibly by his teammate Doku â and is still down.
39 min Chelseaâs best move. Palmer crosses deep, Nkunku heads down, Jackson lays off and Fernandezâs shot flies off Akanji for a corner.
37 min: Fine save by Sanchez! Doku lashes a shot from 25 yards that takes a big deflection and is pawed over acrobatically by Sanchez. The replays suggest it wasnât quite as brilliant as it looked at first, though he still did well.
35 min Savinho escapes Cucurella again and moves into the area from the right. He canât decide what to do so eventually plays the ball back to Kovacic, whose first-time shot from 20 yards is blocked.
Chelsea break and Jackson is slightly offside when put through on the left wing. Play continues for a good 30 seconds before the flag goes up. Pep is giving the fourth official a mouthful.