Spicy sex object, invisible servant or unruly troublemaker: These stereotypes about Latinas didn’t describe the women who surrounded Prisca Dorcas Mojica Rodríguez, 39, who was born in Nicaragua to two close families.
The women around her — including her grandmothers, aunts and cousins — were smart, strong and fearless. Where, Mojica Rodríguez wondered, were the stories of the women who had helped raise her?
Mojica Rodríguez decided to showcase the women who shaped her world in a new book, “Tías and Primas: On Knowing and Loving the Women Who Raise Us.” In it, she examines the archetypes that exist in Latino families: La Matriarch. The Tía Loca (crazy aunt) who is criticized for being nonconformist. The pretty prima, or cousin, who’s considered beautiful because of her European — meaning more white — features. The “perfect” prima, straining under the weight of family expectations.
“I wanted to incarnate the women who made me: the good, the bad, the messiness and everything in between,” Mojica Rodríguez said. She said she wrote the book “to pay tribute to the women in our families and communities. These women are the pillars of our lives, and we have unique connections with them.”
Her book will be out Sept. 10.
An activist and writer based in Nashville, Tennessee, Mojica Rodríguez grew up in a working-class, Evangelical household in Miami. She’s the author of “For Brown Girls With Sharp Edges and Tender Hearts” (2021), a memoir and manifesto about how powerful forces — low expectations, the judgment of strangers and racism — can affect women like her, and explains what readers can do about it.
The founder of the platform Latina Rebels, Mojica Rodríguez earned a masters of divinity from Vanderbilt University.
In “Tías and Primas,” the archetypes about Latina women that Mojica Rodríguez explores are not based on any one person. Instead, they reflect an amalgamation of many people she has encountered. “I am not pigeon-holing people into any one role,” she said. “Sometimes, I am tía la Loca; I’ve been the Perfect Prima, the Second Mom tía. I’m definitely the Book-smart Prima. Some days, I’m the tía who see fantasmas (ghosts).”
“I am attempting to bring humanity into the labels,” Mojica Rodríguez writes. “I want to live in a world where we can see our gente (people) with care and gentleness. I want to peel back layers and ask more questions while elevating our realities as a complex and nuanced people.”
Ironically for an acclaimed writer, most of Rodríguez’ family does not read her work, even when it is translated into Spanish. “They’re sort of really sad that I’m writing this. … In my family, women are not supposed to talk about these things. We’re supposed to be the bearer of secrets and protect our family,” she said. “But I think if they read it, they would understand how much love and tenderness I have for my family in the book and in life.”
A relatable experience
According to census data analysis, Latinos have the largest average family household size in the U.S. They are also the most likely, compared to other racial/ethnic groups, to live in multigenerational households: Sixty-three percent of Hispanic households are multigenerational, compared with less than 50 percent of Black or white households.
This means that many Latinos share Mojica Rodríguez’ experience of growing up among tías, primas and other relatives.
Italivi Diaz from San Juan Capistrano, California, has 14 aunts and 28 cousins. Although she is closest to the cousins nearest to her in age, she has a bond with all of them. “When I was growing up, we (the older cousins) had to help raise the younger ones, to be a good role model for them, to make sure that they weren’t getting into trouble,” said the Cornell University student. “And my older cousins helped me, encouraging me and making sure that I was doing well academically. It is just our culture; there is a lot of focus on being with family.”
Diaz described her favorite aunt as “the funniest out of all my tías.” Because this aunt had only sons, she especially enjoyed time with Diaz and her sister.
Gloria González-López, a professor of sociology at the University of Texas at Austin, said that both American and Latin American societies are patriarchal: With women usually responsible for the raising of children, this construct creates space in Latino and other communities for la tía, or aunt.
“La tía plays a key role for Mexican, Mexican American families, especially where the families may be limited by finances in their access to day care or child care,” González-López said. “La tía is there to offer support to her sister and her family, and to be a source of love and guidance.”
A Latina aunt might serve as a second mother when a mom is working, for example, or as a negotiator between mother and daughter.
“Las tías are part of a constellation of women within extended families that are very powerful and influential,” González-López said. “La tía often helps a younger generation navigate issues around work, relationships, and even sexuality. She symbolizes closeness and trust — someone who can encourage you or give you a hug when you need it.”
González-López added that it is common for Latino extended families to include people who are not blood relatives, or to bestow the term “tía” or “ tío” on a beloved friend. In the 2020 election, many young Latino voters referred to presidential candidate Sen. Bernie Sanders, I-Vt., as “Tío Bernie” (Uncle Bernie) as a sign of affection.
For Ana Diaz, a writer and program coordinator in El Paso, “Family is more than blood ties.”
“We have a tradition of embracing and adopting people close to us as part of our extended family,” Diaz said. Families can “go beyond the bloodline,” she explained, and enrich lives across multiple generations. Just as she grew up in an extended family, she is now recreating that sense of community for her three children.
Diaz values the role that “adopted” tíos and tías play in her children’s lives, whether that means showing up at a football game for her son, or tutoring her daughter in Spanish. “My kids don’t feel that some of their tíos or tías are not blood-related; they just know that these are people in their lives who love them. They are a part of us.”
“Tías and Primas” author Mojica Rodríguez (who is currently working on a novel) is glad that her book is arriving despite the continuing lack of diversity in publishing. Though Mojica Rodríguez has observed an improvement in representation in the book world, a survey this year found that the percentage of Latino employees in publishing from 2019 to 2023 fell to below 5 percent.
“People (in publishing) usually only want to hear specific stories from us; they want to hear about us migrating. They want to hear about suffering,” she said.
Mojica Rodríguez tells young and aspiring writers that “they must be Googleable, and to keep writing, no matter what … write until your fingers hurt, just keep writing.”
She hopes that “Tías and Primas” will lead to more conversations about what it means to be Latina, and how to heal the traumas caused by sexism, racism, homophobia and colorism. “This is my attempt to center us and praise the intricacies, the nuances, and the quirks of our families. To just kind of love on us. But it is an attempt, I hope, among many more to come.”
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