Strictly Come Dancing: first results show – as it happened | Strictly Come Dancing

Before I sign off, one last reader email just in.

Iain Crofts says: “Hi, Michael. Between Tom and Toyah, I would definitely have saved Tom. Based on what I hoped to see from both of them in coming weeks, I expected to enjoy watching Tom’s progress as a dancer more than whatever routines Toyah would be given to follow up on her and Neil’s ‘befringed cowpersons channelling Village People at the Chicken Ranch’ jive. I’m shuddering to think what lies in store.”

Whip-crackingly well put, Iain.

Thanks for watching along with me, Sequin Squad. Our 14 relieved pro-celebrity pairs now dance onto the fancy dress-fest that is the annual Movie Week special.

This year’s third live show airs next Saturday at 6.25pm on BBC1. Meet you back here to decide who’s a blockbuster hit and who’s a box office turkey.

In the meantime, film fans, you know the score: keeeeeeep dancing! Goodnight and have a great week.

A swift straw poll of your comments now. On that opening group nimber, Whistledownthewind says: “Not sure how I feel about the judges taking part in dances. Might it not undermine their comments if the standard of their dancing is no better then the average celebs?”

neko99 adds: “Loved the group dance. Craig would make a great rat king in panto!”

TV viewers can now stay tuned to BBC1 for Paddy and Chris: Road Tripping, in which erstwhile Top Gear duo Paddy McGuinness and Chris Harris begin a European road trip in Sweden. Alternatively, there’s a toss-up between felines and canines with Big Cats 24/7 on BBC2 or The Dog House on Channel 4.

At 9pm, there’s new true-crime drama Joan on ITV1, train-based thriller Nightsleeper on BBC1 or Mortimer & Whitehouse: Gone Fishing on BBC2. Film-wise, Spectre is just starting on ITV2. There’s also Schindler’s List (10pm on BBC2 or The Terminator (10.20pm on ITV4).

And remember that until the next live show, you can get your hoofing fix on spin-off show It Takes Two, weeknights at 6.30pm on BBC2. Monday’s edition sees Tom and Nadiya on the sofa for a farewell interview.

Tom receives the metaphorical sparkly-handled wooden spoon, joining other last-placers such as Edwina Currie, Goldie, Johnny Ball, Susannah Constantine, Gregg Wallace, Jacqui Smith and Les Dennis. Our survey said… ta-ra, chuck.

Tom can console himself that it’s often been the lot of sportspeople to go out first. He joins Martina Hingis, Iwan Thomas, James Cracknell and Tony Jacklin in that particular club.

Tom might not have got near the glitterball trophy but those three Olympic gold medals still shine bright. Chin up, my chlorine-scented friend.

A shame to see Tom’s partner Nadiya Bychkova out of the contest so soon. The Ukrainian pro was back in the main cast after being benched last year but it has proved a short-lived stint. The professional half of “Team Golden” might well blame herself for that unfortunate sequin snarl-up and nervous Tom’s timing issues in the dance-off.

Then again, Toyah’s partner Ginger Neil was in the same boat and it would have felt harsh on him too. At least Nadiya can now lick her wounds in the ensemble with boyfriend and fellow pro Kai Widdrington, who was disappointed not to get a celebrity partner this year.

The series has started with a surprise result. This year’s youngest celebrity, 24-year-old freestyle swimmer and three-time Olympic champion Tom Dean, can consider himself highly unlucky. Sure, he wasn’t the best dancer – those size 13 feet and a lack of experience “on dry land” didn’t help – but he trained hard, put in solid performances and was clearly enjoying himself.

He scored 23 points last weekend and 20 points last night, leaving him sixth from bottom on the combined scoreboard. Perhaps he lacked the fanbase of the other celebrities or viewers assumed he’d be safe – “the curse of the middle of the leaderboard”, as it’s known – so he didn’t get enough votes. Once you’re in the dance-off, anything can happen. Veteran performer Toyah Willcox duly raised her game and Tom made timing errors.

Maybe his shock exit is BBC karma for breaking the embargo and blurting out his participation in Strictly at poolside in Paris, bless him. Still, he deserved to stay a few more weeks.

Toyah, Dr Punam Krishan and Paul Merson have scored in the teens both weeks and, for me, were more worthy of the first elimination.

Toyah Willcox won’t be the only celebrity mopping their brow. Paul Merson did well to escape the dance-off, especially considering that he didn’t know if he was dancing a samba or a salsa.

Dr Punam Krishan, Pete Wicks and Nick Knowles also scored fewer points than Tom but were rescued by viewer votes. This quintet need to show serious improvement or they’ll soon be in dance-off danger.

Is it ginge-ist that two red-haired celebrities ended up in the dance-off? Will Jamie Borthwick be next?

Just kidding. I say this as a ginge myself. Pass the factor 50.